You are my everything - heart

This one's for the love of my life Jesus

Thank you for the cross for you paid the cost

A sinner like me doesn't deserve anything but death

But You clothe Yourself in frail humanity

To save us and bring us back to the Father

Oh how did I fail to see my first love

My Savior Jesus Christ

You are my everything, 

My sun my moon my stars

Your love is like an ocean pulling me closer with its waves

You're like a dew falling in my head

A spring that reminds me there's always hope

A sun that never forget to rise for second chances

A rain that keeps falling, telling me to enjoy

You are the wind that embrace me when I'm in pain

The trees that joins me swaying while I'm in battle

You are all that I need

How did I ever fail to see?

Forgive me Lord

If I was once blinded by my idols

By my desire

You're love it holds deep done through my bones

And who can ever separate us?

Nothing No one Indeed!

Im forever Yours

My heart is forever Yours

I love you

Thank You for loving me too

Thank You for loving me first

Lover of my soul!

You will never let go

You are my everything

This heart is always waiting, waiting for you. But the saddest part is you don't know that I am waiting. But it doesn't matter anyway, what matter is you're happy. This just got to be great waiting.... waiting in vain. I don't really know if you know but seriously I don't want you to know. I want to keep it. as a memory as a feeling, one of the bests feelings I would feel alone... alone with God and some trusted friends. Sometimes I get scared, scared that you'll know, and sometimes when I'm jealous I'm in rush to let you know. "Know" it gets repeated, because I want it then later not. My feelings, still I'm not sure... I'm still hoping.. but still praying if this is real or just infatuation. My prayer is not to own you my prayer is to let me know the truth, even if the truth and His will is to set you free. I know at first it would be very painful, because it took me years to realize this and because I kept this feeling for a very long and silent time. But I don't want to argue, and I don't want us to be in pain and hurt each other. I want to set you free, not you exactly but this feelings that each day grew and I don't know how to tame it. and at the end of the day I still rely to the will of God. but 'till now I still ....love you....

sadness eating me alive :/

‘Loneliness is a required course for leadership’- Elisabeth Elliot
           A true leader must have enough backbone to stand alone - even when the crowd wants to take the easy road home. A true leader cannot be dependent on companionship for his or her security, but must learn to trust God alone. Singleness can give us this kind of backbone - courage, confidence, and leadership skills that any effective Christian must learn. (When God Writes Your Love Story, Eric & Lesly Ludy) 

Psalm 77

1	I cried unto God with my voice,          even unto God with my voice; and he gave ear unto me.
2	In the day of my trouble I sought the Lord:          my sore ran in the night, and ceased not: my soul refused to be comforted.
3	I remembered God, and was troubled:          I complained, and my spirit was overwhelmed. Selah.
4	Thou holdest mine eyes waking:          I am so troubled that I cannot speak.
5	I have considered the days of old,          the years of ancient times.
6	I call to remembrance my song in the night:          I commune with mine own heart: and my spirit made diligent search.
7	Will the Lord cast off for ever?          And will he be favorable no more?
8	Is his mercy clean gone for ever?          Doth his promise fail for evermore?
9	Hath God forgotten to be gracious?          Hath he in anger shut up his tender mercies? Selah.
10	And I said, This is my infirmity:          but I will remember the years of the right hand of the Most High.
11	I will remember the works of the LORD:          surely I will remember thy wonders of old.
12	I will meditate also of all thy work,          and talk of thy doings.
13	Thy way, O God, is in the sanctuary:          who is so great a God as our God?
14	Thou art the God that doest wonders:          thou hast declared thy strength among the people.
15	Thou hast with thine arm redeemed thy people,          the sons of Jacob and Joseph. Selah.
16	The waters saw thee, O God,          the waters saw thee; they were afraid: the depths also were troubled.
17	The clouds poured out water:          the skies sent out a sound: thine arrows also went abroad.
18	The voice of thy thunder was in the heaven:          the lightnings lightened the world: the earth trembled and shook.
19	Thy way is in the sea,          and thy path in the great waters, and thy footsteps are not known.
20	Thou leddest thy people like a flock          by the hand of Moses and Aaron.

Here we go again.. I admit there are times where I really wanted to give up! But there are still part of me that I wanted to hold on to that hope that I have within. What I felt yesterday was really really a push to the edge of my patience. I tried to keep strong but then I gave up I broke down and started crying.. Then I asked Him, Lord! if You know that this was going to happen why didn't you tell me? Why did you let me prepare all the way but didn't let me at least sit on my chair to take my exam. You know and you saw it how I pave for it even I don't like.. Honestly I felt a little grouch yesterday, I wanted to rebel against Him. But still I attended the sunday service and there the church leaders prayed for me not only me but to the souls who needs prayers. I was thankful for that I felt relief and then our pastor's wife hold my hand she prayed and anoint it. She told me that God wanted me to see miracles far above what I could imagine. She was giving me some instructions that I need to put my hands on mama and she would be healed only then if I believe. She also said that I need to pray for courage in order to do that. I felt joy after that conversation and prayer. But still I wasn't feeling okay because I still remember what had happened. Maybe this are what they called tough times! and this is really TRUST HIM in tough times! Lord, I don't know but I wanted to tell You that I am sorry, sorry if I underestimated you and if I have putted you in a box. Lord you know what scares me and that is the future. I don't really understand why You put that confidence in me. Lord I really don't know what You are doing I really don't know. And there's nothing left in me but to trust You.

“Have you been asking God what He is going to do? He will never tell you. God does not tell you what He is going to do; He reveals to you Who He is.” — Oswald Chambers